the doors of perception

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so, in case you haven’t figured it out i have finished losing my accident weight. in fact i’m probably sitting about two pounds lighter than i was after my accident… which puts me about ten pounds away from my original, pre-accident goal.

do i give a shit if i ever lose that ten pounds? not really.

do i expect to lose it if i continue as i’ve started? absolutely.

is that what this post is about? of fucking course not.

i was talking with a fellow instructor recently about one of the people who regularly comes to some of the classes that we teach. this particular person complained about me every time they took one of my classes.

they bitched me out.
they left half way.
they invented their own moves.
they wrote complaint cards.
they walked in half way.
they would correct my exercises to their fellow students.
they would ‘explain’ what i really meant to the rest of the class.
they told us all they were better than us….

this person walked into my class the other day, did everything i said, listened to my corrections AND laughed at my jokes.

the entire time i was staring at them, no seriously regardless of where my eyes were i was staring at this person in shock.

so after class i say to one of the ladies who has been coming to my class for a couple of years ‘um was that really x in my class AND having a good time???’

and she says ‘yeah’ and then she goes on to tell me that she’s convinced it’s because i’m thin now. i *look* like a pilates teacher now… i fit the expected image of my job.

this pisses me off actually because i liked being overweight when i taught, i thought it was really good for my clients and students to see an overweight pilates instructor… but i digress.

so i was talking with my fellow instructor and telling her this story and also how i’ve noticed that it’s a LOT easier to get work now and a lot easier to get my clients to hear me. they have to be hearing me because they’re finally starting to do what i tell them.

she, my fellow instructor, is currently having some thyroid problems so she’s gaining weight at about the rate that i’m losing it. not too much, not too fast, but a steady and visible weight gain.

actually that’s a lie, she’s peaked and is now starting to treat her thyroid and i think she’s actually getting thinner now… but that’s not the point.

the point is that she’s noticed the exact opposite reaction in her classes.

sure the students that she’s had for years are aware that something isn’t right and that she knows what she’s doing so she has no trouble with them. but she does have trouble with the new ones.

they take one look at her and figure she can’t possibly know what she’s talking about because she doesn’t *look* like a pilates instructor. not that a pilates instructor looks like anything in particular.

hell a lot of the older ones are a little chubby…

but she’s probably thirty so they’re assuming she doesn’t exercise and she eats badly and then they project that since she doesn’t work out or eat right she therefore can’t possibly know what she’s doing.

the irony is that for both of us (me a couple of years ago and her now) all you EVER had to do was hear what we were saying and it was clear we knew what was going on.

if you just listened when we told you what to do and did it you would get a great class… but people are so busy expecting their trainers to look like greek goddesses that they’re missing the real message.

a fit and healthy body isn’t necessarily a skinny one.

do you want me to say that again?

just because you can grab an inch or ten worth of chub on your tummy doesn’t make you unhealthy, out of shape OR incapable of teaching others to use their bodies better.

being skinny doesn’t make you in shape, it just makes you skinny.

being in shape doesn’t make you skinny but it tends to lead to weight loss and reshaping of your body.

your eyes don’t know shit about what does and doesn’t make a good instructor, your ears and your body do.

i’m almost tempted to gain a bunch of weight just out of spite but i can’t, the back and knees can’t take it.

it would be a nice excuse to eat mcdonald’s again though…

regardless, the real message should be about how you feel and not about how you look and i just cannot seem to find a way to get the majority of people walking through the doors of any studio i’m in to hear that.

when i was fatter it was a lot easier to get them to hear me, it was just harder to get them in the doors… now they look at me and wish for my body and come to my class to get it…

it’s funny how things swing from one direction to another… just like fashion and ‘healthy weight’ perceptions do.

if any of you learn anything from me let it be this… fitness is about how you FEEL and not about how you look. worry more about climbing stairs without losing your wind than about how many inches are around your waist…

trust me, if you do that the waist will take care of itself and put itself at your body’s healthy and happy weight…

your homework today is to say something nice about your body to yourself :)