snapshots of an idle mind

January 22, 2008

brick wall


living in downtown toronto spoils you in ways you maybe don’t notice until you literally bounce your head off the wall created by someone else ardently disagreeing with you.

in this place it’s normal to be of any random skin colour possible, or to speak multiple languages of which one might be farsi or greek or english or punjab or mandarin or italian or…

and no one cares.

no one cares at all.  we go about our busy and scattered lives and pay no attention to the people doing the same all around us.  we don’t care who they love or what they do unless they are part of the vanishingly small percentage we interact with directly.

it’s kind of an i won’t mess with you if you leave me alone attitude actually.

but i forget, living here, what it’s like in places that aren’t here.  places where everyone is the same colour or everyone speaks the same language or everyone is (apparently) the same sexual orientation.

you see i don’t remember that some people still walk around saying things like ‘all faggots could die for all i care’ or ‘i hope you don’t expect me to feel sympathy for a dead actor who played a gay cowboy.  fucker messed with the last bastion of manness’ or ‘if god had meant for people to be homos they would make babies that way’ or some  other equally asinine crap like that.

i forget and then i ram my head into it.

i think we’ve come so far you know.  gay marriage is legal in this country, it’s making encroachments in the USA and it’s legal in several other countries in the world.

there are fewer gay bashing incidents here than there once were and people hardly bat an eye when they see two men or two women walking down the street holding hands.

nobody cares.  they’re all too busy worrying about their own problems now.  i mean sure there’s the crazy preacher who shows up to picket the pride parade every year but that’s about it.

nobody cares.

exactly what the gay community wants, to be left alone.

and then i hear words like these and i start to get upset and i go looking for information to throw at people and i find this great article about homosexuality in animals… which is here.

foolishly i try to get the other side of the argument to read it.  to at least have an argument based on similar information and all they can talk about is how nature says sex is only for making babies when more and more opinion is swaying to the contrary.

i just don’t know why i still get into these arguments, i should know that there’s no arguing with someone when they have god on their side and the power of their convictions to slay you with.  i should know better than to even try to find reason in this kind of discourse.

and then i think to myself but what about those learned religious scholars who are out there trying to reconcile science with god and sort of succeeding?  what about them?

do i not insult their very openness to new information by assuming that anyone who tosses god into an argument is inherently wrong? that said i suspect that the exceptional scholars are rarely if ever heard to utter the phrase ‘you’re wrong because god says so’

i just don’t understand, didn’t jesus say ‘let he who is without sin cast the first stone?’  doesn’t that mean you’re supposed to NOT judge your neighbour?

apparently though if you repent and are willing to give up being gay you’re welcome in some people’s church…

*shaking head* and i wanted something to write about…



  1. The people you’re arguing have no idea of what God is. They only know fear. In fact, they’ve conflated fear with love. They think that what they’re doing is protecting their loved ones (their country, society, family, selves) from something they’re afraid of. They’re afraid of it, therefore it must be construed as evil. They think they’re acting out of love. And they’re so afraid that they might be wrong, that any attempts to point out their wrongness only increases the amount of fear they have, which forces them deeper into their misshapen idea of what Godliness is.

    There is a difference between God-fearing, and God-loving. You’ve run across the former. In my experience, the best way to deal with them is to utter some sort of noncommital noise, such as ‘I see,’ and then either change the subject, or change the scenery.

    Unless, of course, some part of you WANTS to bang your head against the wall, and then spend the rest of the evening replaying the incident, trying to figure out if you scored points, or wishing that you had said one thing or another differently, and doing this mental masturbation instead of doing something so silly as sleeping.

    Been there, done that. Have the scars on the forehead to prove it, too.


    Comment by balloon pirate — January 23, 2008 @ 12:32 pm | Reply

  2. Who protests a person’s funeral… I mean, really. People might have inner opinions (ones I vehemently disagree with), but to take that to a person’s funeral, put it in the face of grieving family, is unjustifiable. Oh, really… God Hates Fags? I’m sure *He* would LOVE the dessecration of a burial. LOVE IT! (****STEAMING IN ANGER NOW*********).

    Comment by sweet l'il gal — January 23, 2008 @ 7:38 pm | Reply

  3. Oh, I was talking about the Heath Ledger thing, how the religious organization was going to picket his funeral because he played a gay man despite god hating them. Sorry if that looked all irrelevant!

    Comment by sweet l'il gal — January 24, 2008 @ 7:39 pm | Reply

  4. Well you know how I feel about that…don’t get me started. People’s stupidity makes me want to cry.

    Comment by Natalia — January 29, 2008 @ 1:03 pm | Reply

  5. Very, very good observations, chica.

    Comment by Jason — February 1, 2008 @ 10:40 am | Reply

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