snapshots of an idle mind

January 21, 2009

sweet sadness

Filed under: anxiety,bitter pills,bliss,cars,driving,engines,grief,life,random,surreal — sassinak @ 3:17 pm

.

well, it’s official, i have a new car.

okay not entirely official as i don’t take delivery until this afternoon but you know what i mean.  it’s paid for (with some help) and the plates are off my old car and sitting in the windshield/back window.

i may have driven my old honda for the last time and i’m abjectly sad about it.

i understand that i will love my new car just as much and that i will be just as broken hearted when my mechanic says “it’s time, your car is dead” but that isn’t any consolation to me now.

there are a few reasons i’m unhappy about this transition, not the least of which is that i expected to get another five years about of my perfectly tuned, corners like a bmw, gets phenomenal mileage accord.  expected in vain because the body rotted out from under me with very little warning.

in fact i’m a little bit pissed off at my mechanic for not making me understand what was happening.  why was i fixing a rotten car?  why wasn’t i made to understand 3-5 years ago that i needed to spend some money on the body?

how was this a SURPRISE?

.

there is something so *wrong* about throwing out something so perfectly tuned.  i know the body is rotten but the engine has another 200,000km in it EASY.

ah well, i think i found a guy who is going to find a solid body and use my parts to build a car… so at least he’s getting something out of it.

.

so here i am all broken hearted right?

all sad about the passing of this beautiful machine…

and yet?

and yet there’s a little joy here.

i’m getting my very first NEW car!

not new to me, NEW.

as in no one but me has ever driven it (okay, on and off the truck and the broker is driving it to my house but you know what i’m saying) and i have to break in the engine.

as in i get to be the only person who cares for this car and i will know implicitly every bolt that gets changed and fluid that gets dirty and if it dies it will be entirely my responsibility.

it will be *mine* from the day it got sold until the day i sell it or my mechanic looks at me mournfully and says “it’s time, get a new car.”

and that’s cool right?

i should be excited to own my very first new car and i am… i mean i’m totally stoked and i am fully aware that i will fall madly in love with it in time… it’s just i’m having a hard time getting past the senseless waste of it’s predecessor.

.

oh you wanna know what i got?

2008.5 mazda 3 sedan, five speed with no air… cause i like don’t like the air and the power anything…

i do like the ipod plug though… kind of an improvement over the tape deck

.

in other news, what is with these idiots who get high performance cars in an automatic?

or worse, with a manual transmission and NO IDEA how to WORK IT???

.

only thing worse?

porsche sport utility vehicle…

i mean really, isn’t that an oxymoron?

.

oh wow oh wow oh wow

my car is almost here and the plates are off my accord…

god i’m sad for my accord.

man i’m excited about my very first new car…

wow wow wow.

.

and for those of you who know how much i love old things?

yes, i really did basically buy the new car version of the old car i’m throwing out….

.

anyone wanna buy a really good engine?

Advertisements

September 12, 2008

disdatndeudderting

.

so i have some news that will not please some of you; nayrb and i decided a while ago to call it quits.

we were… not treating each other as well as we might have and all the talking in the world wasn’t making it better.  worse maybe since i think the talking was irritating us rather than doing any good.

basically we got steadily less nice to each other.  i got impatient and frustrated and he got kinda needy and we just kept pushing buttons and not really treating each other with kindness.

i’ve been kind of in shock really.

it’s not so much that we believed that we would *never* break up but that we had this deep affection for each other over and above the usual new toy neurological imperatives.  we expected that we would be able to deal with whatever the universe chose to throw at us, that we would at least be together for a few years.

and then it just started to go bad and it didn’t get better.

.

look a picture of me!  in my studio!  in my living room! on the phone!

me n' my studio...

me n' my studio...

isn’t it purty?

.

weirder even than being single again?

dating.

.

look harriet!

sunny!

sunny!

.

mouse with the same ball!

my ball!

my ball!

.

there, see how i distract you with pictures?

really though, he and i are both okay and i’m pretty sure we both think this is for the best.  we remain friendly and are in fact considering throwing a ‘sass n’nayrb split up – bring someone suitable’ party but we’re not sure everyone else would appreciate the humor involved.

still considering it though.

.

i think maybe the things we saw as problems the very first week might have had a lot to do with it, hard to say though.

.

in other news; i’m thinking of leaving my band.

there is a person in it who continues to make me uncomfortable in a pretty shitty way some two or three times a year.  and i know it’s her problem and not mine i *really really* do but that doesn’t mean i particularly want her negativity in my life any longer.

it’s desperately difficult for me to imagine not hitting my drum and singing at the top of my lungs every thursday night but aren’t these things supposed to make you happy!???!

truly i love the band and i regret regularly that i ever mentioned it in her presence.  i think i knew from the first that it would come to this but i don’t know how else to handle it.

i love the guys in that band i really do; they are some of the most amazing people that i have in my life and their bickering and interaction and just general good-natured fun with each other never cease to amuse me [except for the occasional moments when i want to kill them of course.]

either way, after her latest insult i will have to stay away for a little while for fear that i will say what i think.  she is a rather fragile human and most of her issue with me seems to stem from lack of self-confidence so really, anything i say will only serve to make it worse.

frankly i wish i could tell her to take her crap and fuck off.  but i can’t… the guys adore us both.

dammit! dammit! dammit!

.

doesn’t harriet look hilarious with that ball and the sun?

.

happy weekend!

June 15, 2008

all right all right

.

:)

.

i promised myself that if anyone noticed that this blog had died i would write in it again.

i was thinking commenters but it turns out that the people who read this aren’t strangers from the world wide interweeb but friends and family that i don’t speak to that often.

so.

those seem like the kind of people worth writing for.

.

it got really hard to write here after several people at once attacked me and some of those same people used posts that had NOTHING to do with them to somehow “prove” my evilness.

not so easy to put yourself out there when you know the water balloon filled with piss is waiting to land on your head.

that said, this month (two?) off has given me somewhat of a perspective shift on that. i can’t go around living my life for the people who hate me any more than i can go around living my life for the ones who love me. life has to be lived for yourself even if it means choosing to make sacrifices for loved ones.

no, those really aren’t the same thing.

i also can’t go around being afraid of what people who already hate me are going to say when i talk… i mean really now, how is that healthy?

it’s funny because someone wise once said that twenty five percent of people will love you, fifty percent will be indifferent and the other twenty five will hate you. since you can’t control what people think you may as well go after the first quarter.

generally that is a sentiment i have no problem with.

it’s just… it’s harder when it’s people who were intimates for some period of time before they changed sides. they know a lot about you and can most certainly do more damage. in fact i finally moderated ONE person for the first time ever because she was telling secrets that weren’t even mine. worse she was imagining details to fill in blanks and create patterns that never existed and then she was spewing that all over my comments section.

what are you supposed to do with that?

i considered moving the blog and i considered shutting it down but then you see she would win.

in the end i just didn’t say anything at all and i still lost because my friends and family (love ALL of you and you know who you are) defended me and then were in turn attacked by her. i lost double because i never did get another date with the guy she accused me of whoring myself out to and i quite liked him.

[funny, smart, hot, likes liberated women, science fiction and hot cars… what’s not to like?]

i did learn one thing though. my father is absolutely right when he says that what bullies want is to make you engage, to make you fight and yell and scream and the more you refuse to do that the more you piss them off.

unfortunately she got pissed off in public and my loved ones who DID engage took the brunt of her insanity and many of them ended up with hurt feelings. [incidentally miss g i did not, nor will i ever, coerce ANYONE to reply to you. i did ask a playwright friend for help drafting my single paragraph reply to your initial attack (no, i don’t think g is still reading, least i hope not because if she is her life is even smaller than i imagined and that’s just sad.)]

the part that surprises me is that i have trouble forgetting these people that really didn’t have my back.

it’s like i feel like the conversation isn’t over even though it is.

what’s weird to me is that that feeling exists at all when in all cases i could NEVER trust them again. when i know for a fact that my back is not something they have. when, in fact, i know that if i did turn my back they would likely stick a knife in it.

why is it exactly that i can’t stop wondering if they’re well?

.
regardless, this is my blog … MINE and no one gets to fuck that up for me, no one.

even if it did take me a while to get there.

March 16, 2008

this is me feeding my cats

Filed under: bitter pills,bliss,blogging,hockey,life,men,pics,random,surreal,Uncategorized — sassinak @ 1:48 am

.

see that? how i went to the closet and got cat food and gave it to my cats? and see how they stopped yowling for food?

no?

well all right then.

.

so the leafs have had another disappointing season. there are in fact nine games left so they have a decent chance of catching up from tweflth where they are currently sitting to ninth or so.

it’s weird how they’ve had terrible luck and the worst calls and are definitely not going to make the playoffs *again* and yet i’m still madly in love with them. i mean there are a few mitigating circumstances but geeze it’s not like they’re very good either.

by all rights i should be over this team. i should have stopped having a crush on mats sundin and i should definitely not be thinking that they’re playing better than their position in the scoring charts would indicate.

and yet… and yet i realize that i’m not really telling the truth. although they are better than where they are sitting in the standings? they still aren’t *good.*

i can tell the difference. i’ve seen what montreal has done with their young players and the magic word. what magic word? why teamwork of course.

that thing where they practice passing the puck again and again before they actually shoot. the thing where they play together.

god it’s pretty to watch.

please don’t tell anyone that i’m enjoying watching the habs play hockey okay? i mean i’m supposed to hate them they’re like hockey evil or something since i’m a leafs fan. and i am a leafs fan i am…

but i sure am glad my other conference team (calgary!) is playing better…

mmm iginla and kiprusoff… here comes the cup playoffs…

[don’t tell anyone but i think montreal is a major contendor this year]

.

i just went to play a game of dress-up clue where i turned out to be the villain!

check out my awesome card:

clueme1.jpg

anyway it was a surprisingly good time and i confess that i was extra delighted to be the murderer!

plus?

i got called beautiful!

.

i know it’s silly to love the nice things people say about me but well… go me! compliments like that really do make a body feel good.

.

nayrb got a haircut and he looks all extra cute… pretty nice if you’re me also.

.

incidentally?  nayrb fed the cats… thanks nayrb!

it’s interesting how little i have to complain about these days. most of the things in my life that had been causing me to complain (or blog)have been fixed.

i can actually afford shoes and i don’t hurt much anymore and i have a nice apartment and my business is finally doing better and then?  after all that falls into place?

i meet a nice man.

seems so impossible really to be living an angst free life.  impossible but fucking awesome!

.

nayrb and i went to a crocodile farm in cuba and here we are molesting a child:

babycroc1.jpg

night kids!

February 26, 2008

swirls

.

it’s all swirly in my head right now:

part of me wants to talk about my friend adam eating’s dog getting killed last week and how sad i am about that

part of me wants to talk about running off to cuba on my first vacation in five years with nayrb

chunks of me are most fascinated that i came back from cuba and like my boyfriend more… which like, really, i didn’t think was possible

some of me wants to wonder why some people can’t just let me go even though they chased me out the door

bits are wondering about posting a couple of cuba pictures… here’s one that nayrb took of me at a crocodile farm we visited, a lovely cuban man handed me this bird…:

parrot.jpg

whole divisions wish to crow about my facility in cuba because i speak italian a little.  one lady even asked me if i spoke spanish!  go me!  not to mention?  i learned some spanish!

some of me is pretty excited about being back in my life.  in fact i got a little bored toward the end there… but that’s as it should be

parts of me wonder how it’s possible that fidel castro stepped down when *i* was in cuba!  like what are the odds?

the eastern division has me thinking about my beloved leafs and their captain.  it’s interesting that he chose to stay but i think ultimately the right thing.  i mean really, was it worth it to the leafs to lose him?  not for me.  of course i know i have a crush on him but i’m also realistic and this is a guy with a lot to teach the kids that are coming

my heart wants to talk to my parents and my sister but they’re always in bed when i have free time…

nayrb went in the ocean for his first time ever… i’m glad i was there:

oceannayrb.jpg

my heart is very heavy for my friend lsd

my skin feels particularly happy and glowing at the moment.  i turned all italian while i was away and i love it. i wish i had a tan all year long…

yeah, so as you can see, i’m feeling a little discombobulated.  kind of can’t figure out which way is up and at the same time feeling a little disconnected from it all.

ah well, i’ll try to enjoy it while it lasts

.

i am now addicted to vacations.  i’ve already chosen my next four weeks off… one of them is the week i just passed… but next year  :)

February 16, 2008

holy unfairness batman

.
so yeah i’m having a day.

i’m sure you’re all having days too, some better than others… but i’m having a day. i woke up a little late and couldn’t get my head on straight and taught a funny class and went to class where i never quite felt like i was there and then…

and then the day improved of course.

i mean who doesn’t want to spend the first day of their first vacation in five years shovelling out their car after they’ve gotten it stuck? heaving on it with a few helpers? dumping salt all over the place to get traction for the feet as we push?

how about getting it out of the rut only to rub it up against a fence while doing so? calling your boyfriend at home to get you a tow truck? waiting for it and then watching as it pulls your car off the fence… now with a broken mirror and fresh scratches and sixty bucks to the awesome little old tow truck driver named luigi?

almost but not quite killing a pedestrian?

how about realising that you are no longer competent and that beyond calling a cab at three am and MAYBE, just MAYBE managing to pack you are done? can’t even write a fuck you suckers i’m on vacation post done?

doesn’t that sound like the best vacational first day ever?

how about if i tell you that’s only half of the shit that’s wrong right now? that i have a bladder and a yeast infection? [and if you know about my other …issue? that is acting up too.]

don’t you think the universe might be having a little fun with me?

dear universe, i really need a rest okay? would you mind making the rest of the week a little easier than the first day? pretty please?

cherries on top?
.

for the record, i’m still feeling pretty good. i’m aware rationally that although i’m having a brutal day i have in no way impacted my actual vacation in any damaging way.

i mean hell the mirror was halfway broken already!

not to mention? it’s a chilly twenty four degrees in cayo coco right now.. i think that might be the temperature here in fahrenheit today…

all you can eat food and drink… beautiful man to share it with…

five star beach and cuban music to lull me into a drunken stupor…

average daily temperature of 26 degrees celsius and nightly of 21…

yeah, sounds good to me.

.

hopefully this day will stop piling little disasters on top of each other. i’m really hoping that i can finish my laundry and make my bed and pack between now and three am without too much trauma…

.

but you know what happens at 11:10am tomorrow morning?

oh yeah, i land in cuba for day one of my first vacation in five years…

sayonara kids!

January 22, 2008

brick wall

.

living in downtown toronto spoils you in ways you maybe don’t notice until you literally bounce your head off the wall created by someone else ardently disagreeing with you.

in this place it’s normal to be of any random skin colour possible, or to speak multiple languages of which one might be farsi or greek or english or punjab or mandarin or italian or…

and no one cares.

no one cares at all.  we go about our busy and scattered lives and pay no attention to the people doing the same all around us.  we don’t care who they love or what they do unless they are part of the vanishingly small percentage we interact with directly.

it’s kind of an i won’t mess with you if you leave me alone attitude actually.

but i forget, living here, what it’s like in places that aren’t here.  places where everyone is the same colour or everyone speaks the same language or everyone is (apparently) the same sexual orientation.

you see i don’t remember that some people still walk around saying things like ‘all faggots could die for all i care’ or ‘i hope you don’t expect me to feel sympathy for a dead actor who played a gay cowboy.  fucker messed with the last bastion of manness’ or ‘if god had meant for people to be homos they would make babies that way’ or some  other equally asinine crap like that.

i forget and then i ram my head into it.

i think we’ve come so far you know.  gay marriage is legal in this country, it’s making encroachments in the USA and it’s legal in several other countries in the world.

there are fewer gay bashing incidents here than there once were and people hardly bat an eye when they see two men or two women walking down the street holding hands.

nobody cares.  they’re all too busy worrying about their own problems now.  i mean sure there’s the crazy preacher who shows up to picket the pride parade every year but that’s about it.

nobody cares.

exactly what the gay community wants, to be left alone.

and then i hear words like these and i start to get upset and i go looking for information to throw at people and i find this great article about homosexuality in animals… which is here.

foolishly i try to get the other side of the argument to read it.  to at least have an argument based on similar information and all they can talk about is how nature says sex is only for making babies when more and more opinion is swaying to the contrary.

i just don’t know why i still get into these arguments, i should know that there’s no arguing with someone when they have god on their side and the power of their convictions to slay you with.  i should know better than to even try to find reason in this kind of discourse.

and then i think to myself but what about those learned religious scholars who are out there trying to reconcile science with god and sort of succeeding?  what about them?

do i not insult their very openness to new information by assuming that anyone who tosses god into an argument is inherently wrong? that said i suspect that the exceptional scholars are rarely if ever heard to utter the phrase ‘you’re wrong because god says so’

i just don’t understand, didn’t jesus say ‘let he who is without sin cast the first stone?’  doesn’t that mean you’re supposed to NOT judge your neighbour?

apparently though if you repent and are willing to give up being gay you’re welcome in some people’s church…

*shaking head* and i wanted something to write about…

November 15, 2007

parts per million

.

i stuck a nat pic at the end of this for you terry… just one though.

.

there is something so interesting about the repercussions of emotional behaviour that authors everywhere have written endless treatises on the subject from about a million perspectives both fictional and non.

in fact i’m reading yet another fantasy novel based almost entirely around this very idea.

it’s as fascinating to study the effects of love run amok as hate… although one could argue that those are in fact the same thing. anger is at least as interesting as passive resistance and greed is in many ways it’s own reward.

lately i’ve been thinking in terms of wells. some run dry, others are fouled, still more run sweet forever but all of them started out as very deep things that fed us.

like friendships.

you can’t tell when you meet someone what kind of well you will make. will you make a few half-assed passes with the dowsing rod and then give up entirely or will you sink a good and true well that lasts an eternity?

perhaps you will not work hard enough digging the well you will trust your friendship to and will wake one morn’ to find that it has run dry. or worse yet has been poisoned by ill will.

i don’t know that we can tell in advance (ever) where these things will end up. i’m sure that every time someone sinks an oil well they’re hoping to make the strike of all time but i know for certain that you can never really tell how long a strike will last.

okay i’m mixing my metaphors, water is somewhat more predictable although you can’t tell still if the guy higher up the hill is letting his cowshit seep into the stream. but maybe that’s the point? maybe we should treat our friendships more like wells since a good well-keeper will have the water tested constantly and maintain the pump and have the water table checked and try not to over-use the available water and and…

i do know this much though, i know that one thing that always leads to a fouled well is lack of care… and i know that the same is true of friendship. i also know that wells can be poisoned.

i wonder just how many parts per million it takes to poison a well. i know that with hatred just one little part is enough. i’ve also learned that hatred is never reserved for just the person you hate.

you think that it is, but it isn’t because it poisons everything you do. kind of like poisoning a water table rather than a single well. or poisoning a river upstream of a major town.

you walk around and you spread your hate because you can’t help it. you think you’ve managed to reserve it, husband it or herd it to just one little corner of your life but it spreads. it spreads like poison into the wells of your life until all of them are befouled and you are left wondering what it is exactly that turned your life awry.

if you notice.

usually by then you’re so consumed by your ill will toward someone that nothing but their downfall will satisfy you. or, to continue the metaphor, you won’t be happy until the water table has no water left.

seems like such a wasted effort.

.

sassnnat1.jpg

.

okay maybe one more

sassnnat2.jpg

.

last one really

sassnnat3.jpg

damn girl you have some gorgeous eyes.

September 24, 2007

unpaid credit cards and other calamities

.

my client is a no-show, lucky you you get a post… and i still have enough work this week that i’m not worried  :)

.

so

six years ago on january twenty second of this coming year i got into a car accident.  i had just spent the weekend patrolling at osler bluff ski club and was just delighted with my new ski patrol versus my old one.

my boyfriend and i were discussing moving in with each other (which we did in fact subsequently do… and then undo) and our great love for each other along with our hope that we could keep it that way.

i had just been promoted and was finally starting to get the hang of my new job (promoted, might i add, over forty eight other applicants ALL of whom had worked for the company longer than i had.)

financially i had finally gotten myself to a place where i was spending less than i made AND my car was all fixed after a short period of unemployment caused me to not fix a few things.

i had been off the cigarettes for more than a year and was believing that i might stay off (which i have) and had been working out enough that i had muscles and a nice body again at last. [amazing what a boost of energy NOT smoking gave me.]

in fact, i had just (three days earlier in fact) finally paid the balance on my credit card.  a balance which had crept up and up since i moved to toronto and just hadn’t quite managed to get itself paid off.

look, look i danced to myself, i finally don’t owe anyone anything and i have a nice life and a great job and a fantastic guy and wheee go me!

and wham.

i get in a car accident.

a little, tiny, inconsequential even, fender bender.  the kind that does all of six hundred dollars damage to one’s car IF they bother to replace the slightly scratched bumper.

the kind of accident that one effectively pays NO attention to.  and then… it crept.

little things started to hurt more and more and physical activity got harder and harder and suddenly, six months later, there i am fat and broken and hopeless thinking that i’ll never get well.   physios are giving up on me and life is just not going well.

eventually i meet my teacher and realise that being strapped to a desk is going to render it nearly impossible for me to heal and i quit my job.  nobody tells me that i’m entitled to go on disability.  nope, nor do they tell me that i might have been eligible for income replacement.

nope.

so i go it alone… or more accurately i go it alone with my boyfriend’s consent and understanding and willingness to help.

six months we think, it can’t take more than that.

yeah.  cut to a year later, i’m still broken, he and i have split up due to the stress and i’m living in a tiny little apartment and trying to support myself through teacher training while cleaning houses.  (i can’t ever work a real desk job again unless i have freedom to get up and move around constantly… otherwise?  seized up sass.) [just in case you wonder why i didn’t try to get my cushy desk job back in the meantime, it involved being strapped to a phone without a wireless headset.]

cut to another year later, i’m finished teacher training but still cleaning houses (and then i became the super of my building as well but that’s another story entirely) and wondering where the work is.  turns out there’s a bit of a glut of baby pilates teachers in these here parts and there isn’t much.

i get a client here and a couple of group classes there but really not so much of anything and the little credit card that could ends up maxed out all to shit.

cut to now.  i’m working an average of twenty to twenty-five teaching hours a week (which is about a thirty-five/forty hour week in terms of time driving and calling and waiting and… or about fifty in terms of start and finish times on the days that i work) and am slowly approaching my maximum cut-off of thirty hours a week (though at that point i will cut the schedule some so i have some earlier evenings back.)

i’ve fixed most of the shit that’s wrong with my car after five years of poverty based neglect [crap i have to call mr. law and see him about those upper engine mounts…] and boy does it drive better.  like it did when i met it even.  i mean like wicked fun to corner with again!  not as fun as it could be though, i think i’ll get some tires next time i have a spare four hundred bucks. (like november cause i like to get new tires just before winter hits.)

i’ve bought clothing that isn’t from nineteen niney eight or for work or used!

and shoes! and cds!

i can eat out whenever i like!

and here’s the kicker.  the other day i *deep breath* paid off my credit card.

due to holy terror i promptly ran out and spent some money on clothing and a CD and then i went and dropped three hundred and sixty bucks at the vet (mouse’s kidneys are fine for those of you that were wondering and the vet is delighted with their healthfulness) and just now made an appointment with the mechanic.   i then, of course, promptly dumped a bunch more payment on the card…

but see?  i paid off my credit card.

i can’t decide if i want to dance with glee or hide my ass in a dark corner somewhere and never come out so the universe can’t kick me again!

i’m sort of walking around staring at the sky and wondering where the toilet seat is going to come from (sorry, if you’ve never seen dead like me suffice to say that the main character is a reaper and is rendered dead by a flying toilet seat from a crashing piece of a space station.  such a funny show… but i digress.)

i really am scared shitless, how ridiculous is that?

August 11, 2007

pms

Filed under: bitter pills,bliss,dancing,food,life,party,pms,seasonal,Uncategorized — sassinak @ 12:43 am

.

well, my monthly bout of pms is over.

thank the universe

good god that’s freaking awful that is. i was pretty sure i had pms because my boobs were killing me but man it was awful this time. i practically went into a killing depression about my total lack of any kind of familial future, dateable men, money in the bank and willpower regarding french fries.

oh yeah, it was the kind of pms that attacks your self esteem in all the nasty places. the kind that sends you out for chocolate except that you’re too miserable to actually occupy a public space where you might purchase such things. the kind that leaves you staring into your own haunted eyes in the mirror for hours afterward.

the kind that ends in nasty nasty cramps.

because you know, that’s how it is.

comforting that my decade older client today complained about how much worse it gets from here.

oh god… all i can think of is MORE vitamin d and calcium… must not be getting enough calcium because i’m nice and brown…

.

in lighter news, my shindig is tomorrow and i’m stoked.

i’ve made lovely food and am now sleeping before (get this!) someone delivers me flowers! i don’t know who they’re from but apparently i get a lovely bouquet.

go me :)

that’ll be i think the fourth time i get flowers…. counting when sappho died. i mean the full on delivery deal. bruins did it once and tomorrow and the vet and that client hrm… i think that’s it.

so yeah, kinda stoked.

tomorrow i make crudites and cut up fruit and get beer and a little wine and put my feet up and clean up a bit around the place and nibble on party food and generally laze around after (did i mention??) the flower part. yeah that’s cool.

funnily enough i don’t want them often because i prefer them live to dead… but somehow it’s still massively nice to get them.

ETA: THEY’RE A PLANT!  and it’s freaking gorgeous too!

.

i hurt my other ankle.

i know, i’m a twit… get this, i full on banana peel fell off this puddle in the changeroom at the gym. it’s actually too bad for all of you didn’t see it because i’m the one that fell and i’m pretty sure it was hilarious. af couldn’t stop laughing for like twenty minutes and again several times thereafter…

seriously though i felll and landed on my OTHER ankle… *sigh*

anyway it’s not too bad so i’m icing it (in a minute) and going to physio on tuesday.

cause yeah, fun :)

.

there is a meteor shower sunday night, in fact it’s the annual birthday meteor shower and this year af and othercat are sharing that with me.

clear skies please!

.

whee i have presents to open and i haven’t looked inside them yet!

:)

.

mother mother rocks.

seriously.

.

:)

Next Page »

Create a free website or blog at WordPress.com.